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Robert Medhurst used up much of his first week at university looking at online platforms, viewing updates about other students' fun nights out.

"I stayed indoors," Robert explains, characterizing that period as the loneliest time of his life.

The people he lived with didn't go out much, and his course didn't feel especially friendly.

Although he tried by going to taster sessions for multiple organizations, he didn't discover people he connected with.

"I gradually lost my confidence," he says. "It seemed that others weren't interested to form friendships with me, or they didn't like me."

Social Media Comparisons

At first, Robert didn't plan of going to university and was offered positions for post-secondary education.

But then he watched his acquaintances living it up as students on Instagram.

"When you must rise for work on Thursday at 9:00 and you see someone's been out on midweek, you do start thinking the grass is greener," Robert explains.

Higher Education Assumptions

Media content and online platforms can romanticize the concept of university living.

Many individuals come to university with high expectations for what they imagine could be the best years of their lives.

Some students come to university with "optimistic perspectives," notes a counselling manager.

Study Outcomes

• In a poll of first-year attendees early on, the main anxiety was finding their place and being accepted
• Further studies by market research agencies, 17% of students said they lacked friendships at university
• 37% said they felt anxious regularly about building relationships

Individual Stories

Alisha Miah's TikTok feed was populated with clips of girls having fun while cohabitating in college residences.

Yet when she transferred from London to Sheffield to pursue media studies, she found initial days "daunting" because of how much alcohol it involved.

She avoids drinking and had not experienced nightlife before.

"I did spend much of orientation inside my accommodation," she says. "I merely sensed somewhat isolated."

Emotional Wellbeing Factors

In a 2025 survey of over ten thousand undergraduate students, nearly one-third reported they had considered withdrawing from studies.

The most common reason was emotional state, followed by economic considerations.

"Worry regarding these multiple factors is very widespread, and expected," adds a support specialist.

Finding Solutions

Eventually, the students gradually adjusted and developed friendships.

Alisha made friends via her studies and through TikTok, while the individual experienced improvement when she could to share accommodation with peers.

Practical Advice

For Robert, currently in his mid-twenties and in his final year, it was joining his university's drama society and employment during studies that assisted in relationship building.

The suggested approach to first-year students struggling to socialize is to venture outside your living space and attend organization sample activities.

"Subsequent to periods of consistently showing up, others notice your presence," Robert says, "you become familiar with them, and relationships start developing."